I see the sky, and everything in it.

For you: Because you know me, you know my secrets. And you keep them tight.

For you: Because you’re so far away, but we’re the same person.

For you: For your honesty and wisdom.

For you: Because you need me. And it’s nice to be needed.

For you: Because I let my guard down for you. And you broke me.

For you: Because you didn’t know me, and you let me pretend to be someone else.

For you: For leaving me.

For you: For being constant.

For you: For stepping up to the plate and accepting me as your own.

For you: For realising you were being selfish.

For you: For supporting me far beyond your duty of care.

For you: Because I’m here whenever you need me. I love you and I will never let you down my darling.

For you: You inspire me.

For you: You never liked me. For teaching me not to waste my time attempting to please.

For you: Because a little part of me envies you.

For you: For being that girl, that always had everything I wanted. But for still being my friend.

For you: Because your silence speaks volumes.

For you: Because I let you down.  

For you: Because you push me and I hate it. Because it makes me stronger. And you do it because you love me.

I visit THIS page at least once a week. I have it bookmarked. Is that sad? I don’t know. But I guess I bookmarked it, so that if ever someone falls in love with me and are rummaging through my laptop things, the will find it. And then they might know, that if ever they be wanting to buy me something, this would be it. 

Clearly not within a 100km radius of me. 

I’m so upset right now. I haven’t spoken to my mum in like 3 weeks. We had an arguement about my financial situation and things got pretty heated and out of line. She hung up on me when she knew I was having a shit day, and really just needed her support and guidance. So I phoned her straight back and yelled an abusive and upsetting message at her over the answering machine. We were both out of line.

I posted on my facebook this afternoon about how happy I was that I had finally paid off my car loan after 2 and a half years. She commented on it saying “Where’s the ‘thanks Mum’.” And now I’m fuming. I’ve said thank you a million times to her and my step father for everything they’ve given me. And by god, do I appreciate it. And yes, for my 21st birthday they paid for my car rego and insurance, cause I live on next to nothing and couldn’t afford it myself. But she had NOTHING to do with helping me pay off my car loan. I have paid $50 a week for the last 2 and a half years. I borrowed $5000. She in no way, helped me pay it off. AT ALL. So yeah, right now I’m pissed off. And no. I’m not saying thank you. Cause this thing, was something you did not help me with for once. I did this all on my own, and I’m proud of myself. So you know what, fuck you. How dare you post that on my wall, and make me look like an ungrateful person. Cause that is not what I am, and you know it. 

Where did my motivation go? It definitely died with the Red Bull. Should I eat the rest of my ice cream?

I was just checking my bank accounts, and I realised that last week was the last payment instalment I had to make on my Car Loan. I’ve finally paid it off! You have no idea how happy I am right now. That’s $50 extra each week I can save now. CRAZY DAYS. 

I think this one speaks well for me right now:

(732):

i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.